3rd place
bronze star award
Phanuphan Kitsawaeng
united states
title
There Are The Ones The Hurt The Most
Growing up with my father’s Chinese influence, it was common and a tradition for parents to raise their sons as a girl in order to protect them from evil and superstition. An act that may seem reasonable and admirable in raising a healthy child, however, for me it played out quite differently. My protection was not the priority. Quite the opposite. I was not able to express myself for fear of punishment. My sisters were spoiled while I endured physical abuse from my parents. There was a clear, gender-based double standard – whether or not I did something wrong, I was the one who would be beaten because I was born a boy. It was very confusing as a child to be dressed as one gender, but held accountable to the harsh standards of another. As I grew up and began to compare myself to other boys, I started to see how different my childhood had been from theirs. To this day, I continue to be someone who questions gender binaries as I try to unpack my destabilizing history around gender trauma.
“My motivation in photography is to explore the isolated places around South East Asia and let people know, and see the places through my point of view.
Mark used to be a part of the volunteer work with Thailand Healthcare organization: working South East Asia: including Laos, Vietnam, and Thailand. He joined the community for teaching, help, and document the people who had not gotten a chance to meet what many would consider a decent standard of living.
Mark is a recently graduated MFA student in Photography at The Photo Arts Conservatory of NYFA (The New York Film Academy). He hopes to work with UNESCO, or UNICEF after he graduates, and continue to use his camera to bring forth global awareness and change for the better.
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entry description
I was two years old, living in Thailand in 1997 when The Financial Crisis swept through Asia. My family was one of many who were faced with extreme financial hardship. Due to socio-economic reasons and other circumstances I did not understand, my parents decided to raise me as a girl. For almost ten years, whatever belonged to my sisters was passed on to me. I wore their clothes and played with their toys. I used to play and perform as their little princess, dressed as a girl while wearing make-up and wigs. These acts were completely normalized in my family and no other options were available to me at that time to express myself as a boy.Growing up with my father’s Chinese influence, it was common and a tradition for parents to raise their sons as a girl in order to protect them from evil and superstition. An act that may seem reasonable and admirable in raising a healthy child, however, for me it played out quite differently. My protection was not the priority. Quite the opposite. I was not able to express myself for fear of punishment. My sisters were spoiled while I endured physical abuse from my parents. There was a clear, gender-based double standard – whether or not I did something wrong, I was the one who would be beaten because I was born a boy. It was very confusing as a child to be dressed as one gender, but held accountable to the harsh standards of another. As I grew up and began to compare myself to other boys, I started to see how different my childhood had been from theirs. To this day, I continue to be someone who questions gender binaries as I try to unpack my destabilizing history around gender trauma.
about the photographer
Mark Kitsawaeng is a photographer from Thailand, currently living in Los Angeles. He graduated with a Bachelor's Degree in Film from RSU (Rangsit University in Thailand). With a strong background in commercial photography working for Thailand's largest entertainment company, GMM (Grammy), his images are technically skillful and evocative. After honing his craft in the entertainment world, Mark turned the gaze of his camera towards underrepresented communities to bring forth the greater good.“My motivation in photography is to explore the isolated places around South East Asia and let people know, and see the places through my point of view.
Mark used to be a part of the volunteer work with Thailand Healthcare organization: working South East Asia: including Laos, Vietnam, and Thailand. He joined the community for teaching, help, and document the people who had not gotten a chance to meet what many would consider a decent standard of living.
Mark is a recently graduated MFA student in Photography at The Photo Arts Conservatory of NYFA (The New York Film Academy). He hopes to work with UNESCO, or UNICEF after he graduates, and continue to use his camera to bring forth global awareness and change for the better.
back to gallery